Day 21: All You'll ever be is a WHORE

here goes,

I know I haven't been on here in fn ages. Shit happens. (If you can't tell I'm in a very sad/pissed mood) Lemme fill yah in, I've been dating this boy Corey for almost 2 months. I'm coming to the harsh realization is that I'm never going to have a innocent relationship. I'm just going to be a whore. Just another horney teenage couple. IM SO FUCKING SICK OF IT. I don't want it, so why am I always in it! I don't know I'm just so damn confused! He's supose to be amazing.......yet I don't feel it. He says he loves me but I just can't choke out those words. I don't wanna end it god no, I just, I dunno. I don't feel the same way, and that kills me. I just. I'm just confused.

Day 20: What's Wrong With Me?

FYI: This post is going to be really lame and basically I need to put my Big Girl pants on.............but they're in the wash apparently!

1) Everyone is pissing me off! I can't stand it. Everything that anyone does is pissing me off! My grandma irritates me so bad. I know it's mean and all but seriously I can't stand living with her! Currently she has the tv on the wrong channel so the tv signal isn't coming in. She does this all the time AND I'M DONE FIXING IT! I'm not going to fix it another damn time. It's so aggravating.

2) I'm done with everyone rubbing their boyfriend in my face. Especially one named Emily (no I'm not jealous ) Because sweetheart up untill minutes before you started dating your boyfriend, he still wanted me. He still LOVED me. Your just the girl he's with 'cause he's not up here with me. But he proved his true colors and I don't want him. So stop tagging me in the photos of you two on facebook.

3) I can't focus on my school work. I can't do this. My mind is totally screwed up right now.I can't focus on anything anymore. My aunt's pissed off I can't go on a trip with her. I have band and I have to be there.


My mind is sooooooo far from home. It should really come home!

Day 19: A Little Bit Of Everything.................It makes me ME! So............GET USE TO IT!

I've been telling a few close friends this.......bit......of my past. So Lets go back to September 20th 2009. (yeah I hate this day). Jake and I started dating (ended march 14th 2011). Well that relationship got VERY controlling, he was also verbally abusive. Yeah It's harsh using that A word, but it's the word to use. I've looked into it a lot. It fits, so if the shoe fits................WEAR IT. It turned a bit physical. We'd hold hands he'd squeeze my hand cause he got mad at something I said. or grab my wrist a lot.

I'm starting a new Idea.................................................ADVICE blog??? Haha or website/email?

Day 18: Getting back into the past

I know I haven't blogged in a LONG time. I was at Kaylyns (who, btw, is like my sister for life). Plowing trees, falling for a guy, getting my heart BROKEN again. (Caleb G.).

Life has gotten crazy THAT'S for sure I've fallen in love with cameron c AGAIN this is like the third time. He just wants fooling around and that's NOT what I want. I don't and I won't be doing that. I've had my heart shattered one to many times. It's been falling apart.



I feel



empty



alone



helpless



sad



lost



confused



dead

Day 17: I hate you............but I love you!

(So Brody if you reading this.............YOUR A FREAKING STALKER! That and your a fast reader! Haha! )

Today got off to a rather slow start. I mean dragging my tired ass out of bed to go to a class to think? Like wtf! It's summer vacation I have homework as is AND I'M GOING TO SCHOOL? Well it was just a boater safety class. I mean hunter safety was fun and all. The best part is gutting the deer! (channeling my inner psycho killer: playing with the guts is fun! they so squishy!) It was 2 days for 9 hours each day.
I had to sit in the front. The sheriff (further interesting me as a police officer, imagine that me+gun+you=?) had me do all his stuff. Pass out test and pencils for the f tards who didn't read the sheet that they needed to bring one(that's a pet peeve). Learned all the crap and then took the test. I totally aced it. I just now have to get it laminated. I have to have it on me while riding a jet ski. like where the heck am I going to put it? I'm in a wet suit with  a life jacket on (It's the law and I love throwing myself off it at ridiculous speeds!). So I need to find a spot to keep it while I'm driving! grr!

So I came home and I listened to Alyssa Lies. I was bawling within seconds. Matter of fact that's what I'm doing right now. How could you hurt your child like that? C'mon people! Seriously! It takes two to make a child. Sex isn't just for pleasure and crap. I mean it's for procreation not recreation. This generation is forgetting that with all the porno and crap out there. Your basically signing up to love that child until the second you stop breathing. No matter what crap they get into. You got to teach them right from wrong the RIGHT way. How could you do that? Their helpless!

That furthers my dream to be a foster mom XD I love that Idea! By the huge house down the road turn it into a creep looking house much like the Aadams family house! I'll make the inside all cozy and crap. But I really need to worry where I'm going to get the 1.5 million dollars to buy it. I'd also have to evict all the people in there (it's turned into an apartment). I'm going to do it!

Well Emily, yes the girl who stole the guy I liked, has been chatting with me via facebook. I mean when you live so far away and I don't like her enough to text her, it's the best way to chat. Well me and one of her friend (along with her) were totally spamming her status. Anyways she's elmo for her creepy perverted-ness in an innocent way, he's barney for secretly snorting crack, and i'm piglet for BEING TO NICE wtf! I'm not nice at all. They truly don't understand all the secret insults I sneak to them. I'm the queen bee in life.  But I mean she's cooler than I thought she was. It doesn't change my view on her  or him. He's still not talking to me so I only have on thing for him *Flips him the bird*.  I agreed to meet up with 'em when I go to Florida next, whenever that is.

So either way this goes...........................................my life is f'd up, and apparently not just my love life.
Oh and Edward I HATE YOU <3 (inside thing, basically code word for he's my brother for life)


$!DN3Y

Day 16: Nothing Good Happens After 2 AM

"So Brody+I had the ingenious idea to see who could stay up the longest. Well there's no actual proof of it, just honesty. So I've been up 28 hours! Man am I exhausted. He's offline so I bet the butt when to sleep. I would XD I've played the game honestly so far (: I almost fell asleep in the shower but I woke myself up! ('Cause I'm JUST that awesome!) well he caved at 5 pm my time"

So that's my HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER version of my life, aka, where the title came from. Because let me remind you THEIRS A 14 HOUR DIFFERENCE! So this plan was conceived at like 3 am! Okay so he didn't fall asleep........BUMMER!

Kaylyn and I are becoming really close! I can't wait to spend the week with her! She's like my other half!

pure exhaustion is how i feel. Trying to do this bet was the stupidest thing i ever did. Ha ha well i had fun. not I'm feeling the drawback! THEY SUCK

  It's clear the orthodontist  hates my guts. So I go in to his office today. He puts me in the chair all good. They take the bands of open, bite together whole 9 yards. Then he takes off my two front teeth brackets (he re did them the previous appointment because of a failed attempt to bring my tooth in). He then tells me hes taking of all the bottom ones and RETAINERS. After gluing them on he decides the bottoms are staying in and we are tightening them. We hadn't done ANYTHING to them in 6 months, why all of a sudden? Now my whole mouth aches!


Being up for 35 hours is tiring i'm going to get something to eat and then to a early bed for me!

$!DN3Y

Day 15: PEN PAL!

So that's what I really did today. Time flew! I talked with Courtney and this new pen pal Brody from Australia as well! So I've been a social butterfly! Courtney and I had a epic poke war involving her brother Jarrod! IT was hilarious! They found an Aussie flag and were playing with it! We talked about our boy troubles mainly mine with Tyler and em. (hes refusing to talk to me now). And she is BATMAN!

as far as Brody goes: we talk a lot (: crazy fun although his sisters remind me of myself at age 8. FIGHTERS! I remember beating Nathan up when he was 16! I was so mean to him! OH well we both grew up from that age! Now we barely talk and it isn't cool!

Kaylyn: she lives in town and we've actually bonding over a break up! She's GREAT! She's a lot like me! She's going to teach me to ride a 4 wheeler and mud fights! I'm spending most of next week with her......which means CRAP I can't blog! I MUST BLOG! I guess I'll do it the old fashion way and write it by hand and post it when I get home. I'll also be missing two drumline practices! Oh well their un-productive anyways!

nite!!!
$!DN3Y

Day 14: My love life just threw up on me.

My life royally sucks right now.

1) Tyler- He's getting serious with Emily. He won't say "I love you" to me anymore, matter-of-fact he's blown me off ALL day today. She's nice but GOSH I don't like it.

2) Lucas- His friend lied to him about his girlfriend breaking up with him. I guess I was going to be the rebound girl? So now he's back with his girlfriend. He invited me to a church camping trip so let's see how that goes.

3) Jerome- He's PERMINATLY gay. Their's no changing that. He needs a cover up though. I'd kill for him, he's the only one though. So I'll play along, but he want's to make it facebook official. I'm worried about that however.

I've manage to loose all my guys in a matter of days.

I keep giving out relationship advice, but I can't seem to take it and find a GOOD guy. I feel like crap.

Wish me luck with my W.W weigh in. I think it'll be a good week I've been downing water. However lately I've been bloating and reataing water (due to mother nature) ttfn
$!DN3Y

Day 13: And The Player Gets Played

As you know I have three guys in my life. I'm not cheating, I'm not dating, I'm not kiss ANY OF THEM. Now it's bitten me in the ass REAL good. Tyler has a new girl. We are no longer flirt buddies. He's known her for a few weeks. I've been stabbed in the heart. I gave him a tip on how to impress Emily, the girl. I told him to get her the Vampire perfume.  Which will REALLY impress her but now I'm extremely jealous. Which isn't good! I'm so happy for him and I'm so STUPID for ever thinking I had a REAL chance with him. I guess It's my karma for leading three guys on. I feel like crying, I'd cry over the three guys. IT was Unavoidable for Tyler and I though. He would have came to Michigan and we would have TRULY dated gotten really close and when it was time for him to leave we would have stayed together. Then we would have meet someone else and faded apart. Loosing him as a friend scares me more than anything.  I really wish him the best. I think I'm going to have close guy friends ONLY.

Lucas: We talked a little today (: He's my innocent guy although Jake M. says he smokes pot. I'm not getting involved with that side of things. It is as it is. I'm not going to be around it and I'm not going to try and change it. I think he'd be good for me. Would I like to date him, possibly. I'd need to get to know him better. I think he is defiantly cute! I sorta had a crush on him while I was dating Jake. So it is what it is.  He's very sweet but it bugs me he calls me beautifal not beautiful. It bugs me VERY much.

Jerome: He's like my brother and he knows that. He's gay and he knows it. He wants to date me though. He want to make himself want me. I only think that he will be like my gay brother! I don't know whether he and I will ever be anything more.  It's sad because yes our closeness is very good! It just isn't there! That's unfortunate. I did like him in 7th grade and he liked me in 9th. He dated SAM and Marian and I don't like that AT ALL but we make mistakes as well.

Josh: I've tried telling him off so many times, he just DOESN'T get it!


Goodnight! (:
$!DN3Y

Day 12: Pug Challenge Day 1!

I super cleaned my room today! My dad approved this as day one on my 365 day challenge! (It's a leap year this coming year) So If I keep my room the way it is for a whole year AND get all A's, I'll be getting myself a pug!

Boy Drama

Lucas- We have a date next weekend to his church youth group thing. I'm not quite cool with the church thing. He SWEARS it's more fun than about "god" and they pray a little but mainly fun. I can tolerate the small prayer session. I hate the ideas of churches. I mainly believe in magic, dark magic that is. I don't know how well this will go over. Churches make me itch! He seems really nice, but honestly rather desperate. I mean he hasn't spoken to me in over a year and a half. When he did talk to me it was brief because I was around my boyfriend at the time, Jake S, and they were playing softball. Today he told me he wanted to kiss me. He says he's going to call, but he hasn't yet. He lives in Dryden, so it'd be a long distance relationship. IT could be a further long distance thing but a 30 minute drive isn't that bad. I could go to more dances!

Jerome- We agreed to go on a date. Although he's sort of bi! I mean I have nothing wrong with that! However he dated Sam, one of my at the time close friends. I don't know how well we'd go together, but I'll give it a try. I mean I've giving him TONS of relationship advice and vice versa. I just don't know if I can get over the friendship we have. I also worry that it may ruin our friendship if it doesn't work out. That's why I hate dating, you always loose them! I don't want to loose Jerome. He's like my brother! I can't hurt him either! I just don't know!

Josh- I think I've told him off rather well! He and Ann dated and now he's trying to hit on me. He's disgusting and I wouldn't date him if he was the last person on the face of the earth.

Jake M- I think he's gotten the hint that I don't like him, I did talk to him about Lucas and I when I first added Lucas on Facebook.

Texas- Ah my love <3 Well he's doing amazing AS MY BOYFRIEND! Well it's an open relationship so I'm not cheating. I could never cheat in the first place. The way I see he's my top dog! We talked on the phone for 58 minutes, no not an hour! Ha ha we are such dorks! His sister Lauren who's 7 is pretty killer! She's so Funny! We have 2 dates. One when he comes up in the winter time (movies), or when my sweet 16 is. Another is next summer to Michigan Adventures or Cedar Point!

Well this is enough drama to tire a girl out! So it's time for bed! Good night!

Day 11: My life is spinning!

Well today we had a Fourth of July party at Brenda's. Not very many people came. DJ is getting married on the 5th! He's WAY to young! I stuck around with Harley and made sure she was okay swimming, er well splashing! Yummy food like always (:

Well Jerome and I agreed to go on a date, more details on THAT as I find out.(Who asked me to marry him as a joke of course!)
Lucas and I agreed to meet up sometime next week, more details on THAT to come!
Tyler and I agreed to TWO  dates when he comes up to Michigan, oh I'll definitely dish on THAT one.
Jake M. likes me but I don't like him not details on THAT one.

I'm sorry today's post was LAME SAUCE aka sauce that is lame. I was busy all day and now i'm drained of all energy!

Day 10: What Really Matters?

I wish my parents meant when they said they were trying to quit smoking. I've heard this promise so many times and they NEVER even try. I understand it is hard, but there is a big difference! It just really lets me down and makes me sad. I can't believe  them about anything. It makes me loose hope in EVERYTHING.

Way 999 to get your parents to buy you a pug:
Have them bet you that you can't get all A's for the whole school year AND keep your room clean for the WHOLE year.  Yup my dad and I have a deal if I do all of that he will buy me a PUG! I'm DEFIANTLY going to take advantage of this deal. I'm going to potty train it VERY well. I'll have it sleep in my bed with me! I want a blond pure breed male, from a rescue or pound, preferably a baby!

I wish people wouldn't judge to harshly on teen moms. Their several different types of teen moms. 1) I sleep around moms 2) I want to be on 16 and pregnant 3) Rape 4) accident but I'm stepping up to the plate.

1) Sleep around moms- these are the worst. These are also the most common! Often they try and pass themselves off as I'm stepping up to the plate, but their child is often raised as a sibling NOT a child.
2) I want to be on 16 and pregnant- THIS IS THE WORST REASON! To be one of the thousand teen moms JUST to be on a TV show. That child is doomed. You should try and go to acting conventions and things.
3) Rape- The saddest! I honor their choice to have the child. This is the best reason to have a child raised as a sibling. It wasn't their choice. These will be the strong girls who WILL be a good mom.
4) Accident but I'm Stepping up to the plate- They get the worst rap and are going to finish school and raise that child right!

My friend was not thinking one night. She had sex, she got pregnant. The baby daddy doesn't know and it's better off for him. That child needs a good father and not a run away father.Everyone keeps yelling at her and all she needs is support and people who care! It's going to be hard to raise a child at 17! She need love and support. I may not like that she is pregnant. However the fact of the matter is I love her I lover her child to be and I won't leave them. I will help her until the end!

I LOVE YOU GRACELYNN!

Day 9: A Never Ending Birthday Wish!

Well as you know I went to Courtney's birthday party! It was killer! Courtney's sister (Ashley) and I made a sign 'Honk it's Courtney's Sweet 16' and hung it outside! We played with water balloons. We went to meijer and then McDonald's where we honked at a truck full of boys! <3 They honked back and we were screaming down the road driving next to each other!  It was GREAT. Then we went to Walmart where two boys were following us! It was VERY creepy! When we got home we played Glee Karaoke volume one and two! I didn't go to bed till well after 3!

Today I went to Kohl's and learned you can fit 10 pillows in their carts! The crackle from sally's sucks! You do NOT want china glaze crackle you want Sally Hanson or Henson or some H last name Crackle, which I got from Kmart! Then I went home to my aunts and we made Buffalo burgers (: Very yummy! And Ice Cream using frozen fruit! Oh yummy! I tried spaghetti squash, it's very yummy!

More news on Tyler! Guess who's dating him now! Oh yes Me (: Ha ha! It's like an open relationship, but I doubt it'll be that way for long! Gosh I'm so happy!

Todd came up from Fort Knox, we still don't know when he's coming home. We are making Chris' yummy spaghetti1 It's my John's birthday tomorrow, so we will be with him all day. On sunday we have a party at Brendas which I hope we can do!

Till then,
$!DN3Y

Day 8: The Word's You'll Never Say....................To Me

Crush: Tyler and I still talk..........as friends. Dave and I have barely spoken in weeks. I didn't do anything, just we lost whatever we had! I wish I could find an Amazing Boyfriend. Ha, like that'll ever happen. So here's to SINGLE-NESS!

Today: I had drumline and at weight watchers I HIT THE -20.2 LBS MARK! WAY TO GO ME! It is amazing! I had strawberries, grilled cheese, potatoes, whipped cream! Now I packed for Courtney's house and i'm going to her party later.

Bucket Filling and Nice-ness Challenge!!!!!: I said hi to many people on my walk to get Courtney's birthday present and Larissa's babyshower presents. (i'll post pics of all)

Day 7: A Happy Ending?

Weight Watchers: My weigh in is tomorrow. I've had a  lot of salt and not a lot of exercise. I really need to break this habit. My problem is I don't really care for our water. Bottled water I could gulp down like their is no tomorrow. Our water is NASTY. Let's hope for a GREAT weigh in.

Home life: Today was 'alright. I started playing Monopoly with Mike, then he got sick. We have a half-played game sitting on the table. I haven't really done much all day. I've watched tv and texted Tyler. Which we are trying a friends with benifits type thing. I don't know how well this is going to go over but whatever I'll give it a try.

Bucket filling: I'm a very competitive person so Mike thought it was strange I was complimenting him while he was kicking my butt today. I've really shaped things up recently! Keep trying to do it even if it is hard!

Niceness Challenge: So far I've done overall pretty good at this with one slip up yesterday. We all fall sometimes, we just gotta dust ourselfs off and get back up. That's what I did today!

Closing thoughts: Yes todays entry was crappy but I haven't had my inspiration quite today! Let me try and find some! Well I'm going to play some Wii!

~$!DN3Y~

Day 6: A Crush's Tale

I'm use to heartbreaks. I win some, I lose some. Lately I've really lost some. I lost 2 guys in 2 weeks. I fell hard for both of them. I really fell hard for this last guy. The distance was unmanageable. It stinks because I really think we'd be good together. I understand why we can't do it right now, but I still wish I could try. It's probably obvious who it is by my "Who's who" post. It's Tyler aka Texas. A Florida/Michigan relationship would be hard. I would try it though. It's just something to get over. I hate hearing he has a date. I'm glad he having fun and is happy! However Tyler and I have 2 dates planned. One when he comes up around the winter time. Another is probably going to be next year to Michigan Adventures of Cedar Point and do the rip Cord. I really want to do it, he does to. I wonder how things will go! Wish me luck! I also wish to find an amazing boyfriend, but not right now. I'm cool with just chilling and enjoying life!

Today was a rather relaxed day. I had drumline earlier in the day. The bass section knows everything. We know all the drumline songs. So we were laying on the sidewalk, walking around school, and goofing of. The rest of the drumline called us out for goofing off and wanted us to prove to them that we can play it. We showed them up. Needless to say the bass section rocks! When I got home I felt rather sick. I ate some soup and laid down. I felt very sick to my stomach. I knew I needed to do chores so I told my Carol to wake me up at 2 (an hour and a half before my mom gets home). Well it was 2:15 and she hadn't woken me up. Luckily, my phone was on vibrate someone texted me and I woke up. My other sister Holly, is hanging out with my grandma Kent tomorrow so she did chores. Half way threw chores she decided to tell me she wasn't going to do two chores. I was angered that I had to pick up her chores when tomorrow I'm going to have to do them all. I just agreed because I'd rather not fight about something as stupid as chores. I'd also rather not get yelled at by my mom tomorrow. After chores, I hoped on Facebook (which I think is kind of ridiculous how popular it is) and talked to Tyler. Ahhhh *heart beats faster*.  I realised I needed to finish my summer homework (I'm in a Advanced Placement history class, earning college credit) so I got on that. That was basically my boring, unproductive, crush filled day! (:

My Bucket filling challenge: How is the bucket filling going? I'm sorry I didn't ask yesterday! How rude of me! I think for me, this challenge is the hardest for me. I don't empty buckets but I'm sure not use to FILLING them. However mini Mat (Bass buddy) and I went on a random walk around the school. We talked about random things including his art collection. We defiantly were boosting each other's self esteem. So I'm rather happy with myself. It wasn't as hard as I thought. Tyler and I fill each other's buckets all the time. Even though I hate hearing of the girls in his life, I'm still supportive and wishes him the best!

My niceness Challenge: Today I have to admit of a little back tracking. It wasn't to a real person. It was a commercial for those colleges that 'turned people's lives around' the girl that came on had a lip piercing and tongue and eyebrow piercing. She was talking how it made her more professional and was a good choice. My sister and I agreed that she should take out her piercings before we took her seriously. Which was rude because it's her freedom of speech and she obviously enjoys it. Hopefully tomorrow goes better and we can't win them all!

Closing thoughts: You can't always win everything and it takes effort to make things worth while. And I fall for people who don't want to catch me T.T

~$!DN3Y~

Day 5: Rain is A Good Thing

 So there's this boy......Many teenage girls say that to their best friends. I'm one of those. I don't do it as often as others. I've only ever dated 5 people, others the list is to long to count. I like committed, long term, true love type things. I like people A LOT like me and then opposite a little. Mainly the guy needs to put up with my stubborness. When I have a cause I'll do anything to fight for it. Well this boy I REALLY want to date, BUT I need to get to know him more. We've stayed up for 48 hours talking and have had QUITE a few funny moments. We even have our own inside joke already (Yeah like those lame couples!). It's awesomKe. It was a typo, resulting in a totally new spelling of the word. I really Like him. I'll DEFIANTLY keep you posted, and maybe He will read this.

Next, getting to the name of this post, RAIN IS A GOOD THING. Not only is that song an amazing song, but it really is true. I challenge you next time it's just raining (not thundering) go outside and sit on your driveway. Leave your phone inside, leave your music, leave everything; don't bother changing into a bathing suit, just sit. Enjoy the rain hitting your face, the sound of birds chirping, the sound of rain. It's very relaxing and a good time to think. Its a good feeling, feeling the rain roll down your face as another hits your face. It rained here today and that's what I did. I sat on my picnic table and sat there till it stopped raining and I was inspired to write this post (: (You can also thank this boy for my rebellious smiles).

My nice-ness challenge: How is that going for you? Today I went to my families cook out dinner on Monday nights. The neighbor was over and she brought her family who was from Russia. None of them spoke English and no one could translate. We used hand motions and a ipod translator to communicate. It was a nice experience. There was a boy I would say to be between 10 and 12. He wanted to go on the tire swing (a large tire connected to a rope on a huge tree). We had to show him how to position himself and how to stop. Although we were not physically speaking to him, we still communicated. Later on we had to round up the 276 hens into their coop. There is only one rooster. I had to use hand motions to tell this boy to be careful of his spike. It took a little more effort but he knew what I meant. Today is also my nephew Brayden's birthday. We had cake and ice cream and we sang happy birthday. This boy(It isn't Michael but is the best name I can pull from it), who's name is not translatable, knew all the lyrics and sang along with us. I think it was a nice experience it most defiantly made me appreciate the fact that everyone can understand what I'm saying to them. I encourage you to continue with your socializing it may even help you

FIND YOURSELF
~$!DN3Y~

Day 4: A Second Dose of the Three R's and Some Bucket Filling

Race Religion RESPECT

My friends Dave and Alexis are really close to each other, Like brothers and sisters close. See Dave is white, to be expected from a small town like mine. Alexis is black, which there is less than 20 people of mainly all kids. Alexis is adopted, and she acts like you and me. She isn't from the Ghetto and she is NOT about to hold a gun to your head. I don't even think she could load a gun (No offence Alexis I love you and all but it's true!). Yet people in our town treat all the people of color like we are in a Ghetto and these people are criminals. Well that's so NOT true and I'd like everyone to get their head's out of 1950's for a moment. Alexis is a VERY smart person and an AMAZING clarinet player! But Dave and Alexis and friends couldn't go see Super 8 in theaters because Dave has a racist friend. That angered me! Your hating on someone for something they can't control! That's like saying Brown eyed people are superior (I mean in the gene world they are), come on! This is the most ridiculous thing I think has ever happened to not only this country but countries around the world. People want to be superior to others. They want to have power over someone and make them feel bad. Well try being on the receiving end of that, maybe you'll stop it. Everyone knows the "N word" is a very BAD word. It was acceptable at one time but it was a common word not a degrading insult! But apparently I'm not allowed to call a person of color that (NOT that I ever would, but just hear me out), it's a terrible thing to do, it's rude, etc. HOWEVER! Two people of color can call each other that no problem. Now who's trying to be better than whom? I think if it's bad for one person it's bad for all you can't go changing rules for a certain class of people. That's not equality. It's a basic principle. What is done to one person for a crime is done to another person who did the same crime. Take this: Little town, Johnny and his friends decide to spray paint "Hi" on a building really big and decorative. They get caught, slapped with a fine, and forced to do community service. HOWEVER, Devin living in a the ghetto decides to spray paint "Hi" also now one would think that it should be equal punishment BUT really they get away with it A LOT more. Hrm, Lady Liberty I don't quite understand you.


My Niceness Challenge:Have you talked to someone new? Have you talked to someone you may have previously judged? Well so far I have twice! I commented on people's blogs who had similar interests as mine and left nice long comments on the good things they are writing about. Try to think that everyone has a bucket they carry around with then, or a cup or some sort of refillable object (yes a balloon will work) and everytime something nice is said about them or makes them feel good their object gets fuller but as soon as something mean is said that bucket is quickly sucked of it's content. Try to fill people's buckets and reduce your lowering as much as possible.In my opinion thinking a negative comment about someone is just as bad as saying it, so reduce your negative thought. Not only will the people around you like you more but the world seems happier because your not having a negative mind set. Sometimes the strangest things like walking up to a random girl your age, or guy, and saying I like your top! where did you get it? Can really make them feel better. You don't know that person's life story, they could have been on their way to commit suicide and you wouldn't have even noticed. That random person may even turn out to be your best friend you end up sitting in the nursing home with ramming your wheelchairs together! So just be a bucket filler!

Day 3: The Three R's: Race, Religion, RESPECT

If you want to know of a great movie for the whole family, watch That's what I am. It came out in 2011 never hitting the theaters, which is a bummer because it is a FANTASTIC movie with FABULOUS life lessons through out the entire movie. It's about a average 12 year old paired with a "nerd" "ugly" "ginger" 12 year old boy called Big G (he's the biggest kid. big ears, and a ginger) for an English project. Now he is suppose to be unattractive, but I find him rather cute! Now on the radio in the town, they have a contest write in 25 words or less your solution for world peace and you win a very nice sports car (in the 1960's). The English teacher won by using four words.

Human Dignity + Compassion = Peace

Now this leads into what I wish to talk about. See I went to Michigan Adventures. You know when you go to any amusement park you see people of all ethnic groups, speaking in different languages, wearing "different" types of clothing's. You always get some sort of "haters" for those people. The biggest group that sticks out, to me at least, is people of the Muslim faith. They are all dressed up (which I think those outfits are actually very cute, even though they aren't revealing) and I KNOW some jerk out there is thinking "Terrorist" THAT'S NOT RIGHT. My step dad is currently deployed and you know what the U.S.A. is at war with? A group of people who share a similar faith, NOT the faith as a whole! That family did NOTHING to us and WAS NOT involved in the terrorist attack on 9/11 (rest in peace all the souls who were lost that tragic day and to all the soldiers who never came home because of that and I pray all the soldiers over seas are protected and brought home safely to their loving families who miss them very much). I don't like it when people try to force a religion on you. Your an individual and you should be allowed to have your own individual ideas about things. I admit to reading both the Bible and the Satanic bible. Their were parts in both books I liked and Disliked. Its all a personal opinion. Now the Satanic bible gets a bad rap as worshiping the devil when ACTUALLY is a highly offensive religion to some because it promotes happiness as long as you follow the laws. Such as, if your a male and your married to a female but want another female which would be considered adultery your allowed to IF your wife says it is okay. People think that is the devil's work ergo Satanic. Read it before your judge please! Once you found your faith, stick to it! I'm glad you found something to believe in! I'm still finding mine, ha I'm still finding me! But please don't go bashing other's people religion because you don't agree with it, that's not nice and you don't wish that to happen about you.
If You Don't Have Anything Nice At All Don't Say Anything At All


Do Onto Others As You Want Others To Do Onto You

The next thing is people who speak a different language. Yes I'm guilty of wishing people just spoke English  so I knew they weren't bad mouthing things or because I thought it was annoying. I apologise to the people I wished that upon because it's your FREEDOM to speak whatever language, even if it is made up, in this great country of mine. Our country does not have a official language because we honor THE THREE R'S (That I Cleverly Made Up). I bet people in other countries that do not speak English, or whatever language you speak, aren't to fond of hearing us speak but you know what they respect it. This country is so CRUEL to each other. It is not cool!

Tolerance: The One Thing The World Lacks

You can never get everyone in the world to agree on the same thing. Coke or Pepsi. Such a basic question but the world will never agree on one or the other. Not everyone can be convinced of everything such as AIDS cannot be spread threw saliva UNLESS you consume over one gallon of it rather quickly but who in 15 minutes will down one gallon of freshly made AIDS infected saliva? not many. Another AIDS cannot be spread threw toilet seats UNLESS a AIDS infected person is using the bathroom and has a bleeding sore on their buttocks and within 15 seconds your buttocks with a bleeding sore in the same spot comes in contact with the blood. honestly who is out of the bathroom THAT fast (with a bleeding sore!) and some one's butt on the seat? IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN PEOPLE! Gay, Homosexual, Sparkle fairy, Faggot, etc. Those can hurt people's feelings. That topic is highly debate-able. The reason why most states do not allow same sex marriage is because they wouldn't get as much money for insurance. I believe that is ridiculous because this is THE LAND OF THE FREE, but apparently someone did not get the message. It is proven being homosexual (A word I think everyone will find non offencive) is in your DNA and is NOT a chosen thing. I think Love IS love and as long as two (or even three or more, if they are all happy) people are happy then let them be in love. Let them be happy the way they are. You may not like it, but they do. I do not wish to see full blown same sex make outs but I don't wish to see opposite sex couples do that either a peck kiss is FINE! (Rest in peace all the bullied people who committed suicide over their sexual orientation)

Love Knows NO Boundaries! <3

Respect. Be tolerant of other's choices. You may not like them but they do! Please let them be! I challenge you this week to have an open mind about everyone you see. That weird guy down the street based off of looks that he CAN'T control, get to know him! Be friendly! Try new things! Make new friends!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T Find Out What That Means To ME!

Till Then,
Sydney OUT
$!DN3Y

Day 2: Who's Who

I plan to be VERY open to you. If one of my friends were to hop on here and read my blog, they will know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. So Here is my whole family and friends with a description! I've only included their last initial for privacy reasons.

Friends:
Aaron E- Class of 2011. He's openly Gay. I look up to him. He isn't afraid to be himself and he is dedicated to helping others. He WILL be famous one day.
Aaron P- Class of 2007. My Friend Larissa's boyfriend. He's VERY nice!
Alexis J- Class of 2014. My crazy clarinet buddy!
Allison B- Class of 2014. My other crazy clarinet buddy! we call her Ally-son.
Andrew A- Class of 2014. My OTHER crazy clarinet buddy!
Angela C- Class of 2012. She is the person who knows the most about my life, even more than my parents! She is the best person to talk to in the world!
Ann L- Class of 2012. One Parenthood class and we became besties!
Bailey B- Class of 2016. My sister's best friend. She lives 2 houses away from us!
Cassie C- Class of 2012. Drumline buddies! She plays Cymbals for the second year in a row, and she is NOT happy about it!
Courtney F- Class of 2013. She's my pen pal from Australia.
Courtney K-Class of 2013. Another parenthood Buddy! Very amazing chicka!
Dan S- Class of 2013. Percussionist in band. Very funky personality!
Dave P- Class of 2014. My Snare buddy on drumline! He's hilarious!
Ed E- Class of 2013. An Ex boyfriend of mine. He's like my brother!
Cris A-Class of 2000ish. He's in National Guard with My step dad. We all call him our brother.
Janice S-Class of 2012.  One of my close girl friends.
John S- Class of 2013. We often call him Soda Pop because of his last name. He is like my brother! he knows as much as Angela.
Jake S-Should be Class of 2011, but to be determined. Ex boyfriend, BIGGEST REGRET
Kaitlyn H-Class of 2013. We call her Kat and she is very caring!
Kayla C- Class of 2014. She's dating Soda pop aka John. She's a lot like me!
Larissa H- Class of 2012. My baby mama! Dating Aaron. Gracie is due August 20th.
Mat S- Class of 2014. Bass drum buddy with me!
Sarah B- Class of 2014. Clarinet buddy! And yes she is crazy awesome!
Shelby K- Class of 2013. My third and final parenthood Buddy!
Sam S-Class of 2013. We've known each other since we were 6. We had a fall out when she fell for my boyfriend (Jake). but we broke up and now they are happily dating. We are fixing the friendship!
Tyler R- Class of 2014. We went to summer camp together in 2010. He lives in Florida but he's from Michigan.
Jerome S- Class of 2013. One of my close guy friends he lives 20 minutes away.
Lucas R-Class of 2012. Played softball with Jake S and Jake M and thought he was cute!
Emily A- Tylers flirt buddy in Florida
Fam{ILY}:
Todd W- Step dad Married to Becki
Becki W- Mom Married to Todd
John S- Dad married to Kim
Kim S- Step mom Married to John Adam and Nathan are her kids
Adam P- Step Brother, Married to Krista, Mother is Kim. Brayden and Cameryn and Brooklyn's dad.
Brayden- born in 2004. My nephew, Adam's  and Krista's son
Cameryn- Born in 2010, My Niece Adam's Daughter (Sydney's daughter, Sydney is Adam's ex Girlfriend)
Brooklyn- Born in 2005. MY Niece. Adam and Krista's Daughter
Nathan S-Step Brother, Engaged to Britney. Mother Is Kim.
Britney N- Nathan's Fiance.
Mike W- Brother born in 2001. Todd and Becki's son
Carol W- Step sister born in 1994 Todd's daughter form a previous marriage
Holly S- sister 100% blood. John and Becki's Daughter born in 1997
Pat- Ashley,erin,  Chealsea, Adam, Nick, And Anna's dad (all graduated) Mike's twin brother
Cris- Married to robin
Mike P- My uncle Drew and Cam's Dad Married to Jackie, Kims Brother
Jackie P- My Aunt Married to Mike
Cameron P- Cousin! Class of 2012. Mike's son
Drew- Cousin! Class of 2008 Mike's son
Grandma- John's Mother
Jojo- Aunt, John's Sister Jerry's sister, grandma's daughter
Mark- Married to Jojo
Grandma Kent- Becki, Debby, Sandy, Tammy, Jim, Brenda's Mother
Papa- Becki debby sandy tammy jim and brenda's father, my grandpa
Debby F- Heather and Nicole's mother
Heather- Currently pregnant baby is due January 1st 2012.
Nicole- Married to brad. Harley and Dexter's mother. Faith's Step mom
Brad-Nicole's husband. Harley, Dexter and Faith's Dad
Sandy- Doug Steve and Phil's Mother, married to Mike
Mike- Doug Steve and Phil's dad, Married to Sandy
Doug- In a relationship with Libby, Going into the Marines
Steve- Married to Jamie in the Marines
Jamie- Currently pregnant due December 2011
Phil-Married to Gina in the marines
Gina- Married to Phil
Jim-Married to Kim and Anna's Dad
Kim-Married to jim anna's mom
Anna-Kim and jim's Daughter born 1996
Brenda- Married to David, Dj's Step mom alex and Zack's mom
David-Married to Brenda Dj, Zack, And Alex's Dad
DJ- Us Army married to sam
Tammy- Married to Gary, Eric's mom
Gary-Married to Tammy
Eric- Class of 2010

Day 1: All About Me

• My goal in life can be described in one word => Happiness.
• My birthday falls on the fall solstice. I technically have 2 astrological signs.(I always go with Scorpio though I mean COME ON scorpions are so much better!)
• My weakness is spelling. Words never look right to me. The Spelling always seems off. Is that some sort of Dyslexia?
• My strength is LOVE. It often ends in me getting hurt and wishing I was older when stuff like that didn't matter. I want my Mr. Right now. I'm tired of the pain and drama of a relationship. I always give it my all but I fall for 'Tools' so I end it. So right now I'm focused on friends and to maintain my happiness and Improving life for others. 



She died at the age of 79 in March, 2011 R.I.P

• I'm often told I look like Elizabeth Taylor a famous actress. She's probably well known with the current 70 year old's. (I would say grandma's but frankly once your 20 you could possibly be a grandma)
• I HATE the idea of teen mothers. It gives this generation a bad rap. One of my closest friends is currently pregnant. She's due August 20th. Now before everyone goes and judges her. Think of the whole picture not one little detail. She's 18, yes that is young, it was a stupid decision. She's working on moving out, even before Gracie happened. She's graduated, has a job, a supportive boyfriend (not the father). Baby daddy doesn't know he's a father, everyone assumes it's her boyfriend. Frankly he will make a better father than the other one would.
• I love 80's songs. I barely listen to the newer songs that are out. My favorite artist is by far Alice Cooper. He is amazing and I can't wait to see him in concert! I also like Journey, ACDC, Bob Segar, Kid Rock, Ozzy Osbourne, Taylor Swift, Lynard Skynard etc.
• I love the outdoors and camping. Actually currently I'm sitting in my pop up in my front yard writing my blog.
• I'm not afraid to be myself. I'm sorry if that isn't good enough for you. I get along with everyone and I'm very social.
• I often think about what qualities I want in my Mr. Right. He's going to have some big shoes to fill! I know he'll be perfect for it though.
• I start several journals with the hope of writing cover to cover but I abandon them. I'm never able to commit to it. I hope this will break that problem.
• I hardly watch TV. However when I do watch it, my favorite shows are 1,000 ways to die, NCIS, Degrassi, and Pretty Little Liars.
• I would describe myself as; Determined, Responsible, Respectable, Lovable, Emotional, Honest.
• I'm enrolled in Weight Watchers. I'm not over weight though. I only wish to see a healthier me. I enrolled in January 2011 and as of today I have lost a total of 19.8 pounds. I've learned to love veggies so MUCH more. I actually prefer steamed squash over Ice cream, strange huh?
• I'm not a judgemental person especially when it comes to looks because who says one thing is cuter over another. It's nothing you can control. It isn't right at all! I've been on the receiving end of that and it sucks!
• I LOVE acting and helping out in Theatre.
• I often tend to fight for what I love. Those people know I love them very much. When you loose then you know you fought as hard as you could and you couldn't do anything more. It clearly was not ment to be.
• I'm totally confident enough to walk up to a random stranger and cook up an interesting conversation
• I play Clarinet, Cymbals, Bass drum, Piano (Very bad I'm improving), Snare, and currently trying to learn drum set to be in musicals
• I DON'T SING, I have no talent for it but I'm okay with everyone knowing how crappy I sing, I guess I'm over confident on THAT part.

I'm Still Finding Myself!